"Do I have to fall asleep....with roses in my head..."

Many of you have commented on how I should be a writer; that I have a natural flow of my words and my description of details. And I want you to know it's something I've always loved - the expression of self through words. (And it's even more intense when I get to express words through music). But I can't just always spit these words out at the drop of a hat. Some days it's fueled by the emotions I'm feeling, and other days the emotions are too intense to translate into words until I can fully wrap my head around them. Some days, someone, or somewhere, or something just plain inspires me and I feel this rush of words pouring out of my soul and into my brain for translating, while other days things may just feel so common and ordinary that there's no true emotion behind the words. So while it's been almost an entire week since my last update, I really haven't been inspired to "put the pen to the paper" until tonight, and there's nothing worse to me than reading something I wrote (see my post on my first day in LA) that I don't feel the emotions all over again when I'm rereading it. Bland, feelingless, forced writing is so boring and is almost a waste of effort in my eyes.

So, now that I've got that little prose-jaunt out of my system... :)

I've gone through such a range of emotion just the past 24 hours alone that I'm just kinda mellow right now. Not sad, but not like last night crazy happy either. I'm in this in-between stage where I don't know what's going on and it's driving me crazy. I know it's only been a week and things don't have to move at warp speed but like, ugh, I hate the question marks. I just wish I knew so I could get on with things and not be thinking about it. I didn't expect for this to happen in a million years, really seriously. It caught me be suprise and now I feel like I'm awkwardly navigating instead of being fully prepared. Ughhhh I need to stop this line of talking now. Lol. I told myself I wasn't going to do this on here, but sitting out in the heart of this completely gorgeous campus this evening after taking a walk with some awesome girls I've met and decidedly coming to the conclusion that I need to let things be for the evening and see what tomorrow brings is serving to be harder than I expected when all I can think about is that one thing. Okay. seriously. i'm going to shut up now and let you all draw your own conclusions because I really did promise myself I wasn't going to do this on here...it's just hard to focus on typing about something else when you're mind isn't fully in it.

Katie Glynn, i really hope you read this blog because you're the only one who is going to understand this next sentence and I'm putting it on here especially for you because I thought of you today when it popped into my head: I'm twitterpated.

Okay. I'm going to try and do this....focus on all the other experiences I've had...

Last Tuesday was my first day of my internship at Solters&Digney PR. I woke up super early (645) and still got there only 3 minutes early (927!) I don't know why it took extra long that first morning because ever since then I've been completely fine waking up at that same time and getting there at normally around 911, so I have time to grab coffee or something if I need it. Otherwise I'll read a few pages of my book until about 925ish.

Anyway, so I totally dress up, because it's my first day of work, and that's what you do, right? I'm in this way cute creme skirt with brown polka dots and green trim with a creme cami under a brown short sleeved jacket with brown open-toed heels that I carried in my purse and wore flip flops until I got to the office and changed into the heels. So, like uber cute, uber dressy-totally professional....for only the East coast apparently! I walk into the office and the first guy I see is in jeans, the second guy I see is in jeans and a button down denim shirt and (he's not gay, which makes this next part baffling to me...) ugg boots, and the third guy I meet, who happens to be the President of the freaking company, is in jeans and a tshirt. Ooooookay, memo to Stephanie, we're not in Michigan anymore! It just seemed weird to me. Anywho, so that was my first thought. My next thought was, oh my God this office is A)incredibly small, B)incredibly cluttered(even for me), C)composed of 3 middle-aged men and I'm the only female...what the f*** did I get myself into?! (hey I'm being honest, that's really what I thought.) I immediately felt like I needed to look down and make sure my shirt was adequately covering everything, and not because they all looked or anything because they didn't, but just because I was instantly uncomfortable. I slightly panicked. But i had to make sure to pull myeslf together because I was meeting the President and then I started telling myself that many other interns have come through here with the University of Dreams program (Bryce said he's been working with them for about 4 years now) and I don't think they'd put me in a shady position. But I still made a mental note to keep my wits about me.

So anyway, Rene -the guy I technically had my interview with, but is apparently the lowest man on the totem pole in the office - shows me around (as best as we could move) the tiny place and I'm already starting to feel clausterphobic. But we get to the last office and it's nice and big and clean and has pictures on the wall and it immediately calms me down. And Rene says "This was Mr. Solters' office" (Lee Solters ran the company all the way back to the Sinatra (yes, Frank Sinatra was one of his clients) days and is the owner; Jerry Digney signed on and eventually became partner and took over the role of president as Lee began to age more and more). And thankfully I was too like in my head to respond to the "was" because he goes on to say, "I'm sure you've heard that he passed away about 4 weeks ago." And unfortunately I didn't have enough wits about me at the moment to say, "oh yeah" and instead I stupidly say "no" and then I realize it makes me sound like I did no research whatsoever into the company I was working for when in reality I did....I just did it in May while the owner was still alive! So anyway, the poor guy was 90 years old and Hollywood PR/publicity legend...he has a huge list of clients ranging from Sinatra to Barbera Striesand to Led Zeppelin to Bob Newhart to (I'll say more about this later...) Michael Jackson. I am so sad that I never had the chance to meet him, to work with him, and most importantly to learn from him, but on the bright side of things I feel lucky to be able to put on a resume that I worked for a company that bears his name and legacy.

So anyway, one of the publicists was on his way to a meeting with a client and he said to the others if they didn't have anything prepared for me to work on yet what a great experience this would be for me, especially on my first day. So the other two are like yeah, go ahead so before I know it, I'm getting in a car with this middle-aged man I just met and it goes against everything ingrained in my system from growing up - Don't get into cars with strangers, don't let yourself be alone with a man you don't really know, etc. So my brain is on high alert, and I'm sure he could probably tell because I sat so stiff and kept my purse clutched to my body like a lifeline in a position ready to bolt if I needed. But I still remained cordial and conversed about home and being in California for the first time and schooling and things like that. Lol and I remember driving on the highway and you could see these really big, rocky hills and I said before I could stop it from coming out of my mouth: "Are those, like, mountains?" and then realized how stupid,blonde, valley-girlish I must've sounded and sort of chuckled and said "Please excuse me, you gotta remember this is my first time to California and I wasn't sure if there were mountains out here or not." and he kind of laughed and said yeah that they were mountains and then explained the haze around them and I really didn't fully hear him because when he gets talking about a topic, he goes on forever and will repeat the same point multiple times and you're just kind of like oh my gosh this is painful we can move on now kthanks.

So we arrive at this place called Americana something or other and basically it's an outdoor mall and it's so so so so cool. Store entrances are all from the outside, but it's not like a strip mall, it's like a circle and the roof of the mall has been cut out. And they have some mighty "posh" (haha i love that word now thanks to my new friend here from England!) stores. We were meeting the client at the Barnes and Noble so we went in and we were kind of early so we kind of looked around for awhile and he seemed amused that I was so enthralled in all these different kinds of books. I smiled and told him I'm a closet nerd and only priveleged people in my life know it about me.

So background on the client. Our firm represents Pat Boone's (who, I hate to admit, I didn't know until they told me he was like almost bigger than Elvis in his day) Record Label.
We were meeting with a band on his label (who I also didn't know until it was explained to me) who is unveiling their 40th anniversary CD in July called ShaNaNa. For those of you from my generation who have no clue who they are either like I did, they played at Woodstock in 1969;their set was right before Jimi Hendrix. After Woodstock they played the band "Johnny and The Gamblers" in the movie "Grease" (think of the school dance scene...that's them!). Not only did they make that appearance in that movie, but 6 of their songs they performed were in the movie and on the soundtrack, and their keyboardist wrote the song "Sandy" for John Travolta. After "Grease" they had a hit TV variety show for 3 years called "The ShaNaNa's" and then kind of disappeared off the TV screen but continued all the way until now to record and release albums. So, although they may not be the most recognizable name to my generation, they are definately a huge part of rock n' roll history.

So we were meeting with the drummer from the band, Jocko, a representative from Pat Boone's label, and the Barnes and Noble events planner and store manager. I felt like, big time lol. We met on the third floor a the coffee shop and everyone stood up and shook each other's hands and Jerry Brown (the guy I was with) introduced me as their new intern and it was my first day and everyone was really nice about that asking if I'd been to California before and yada yada.

So they start talking about arrangements they have obviously already talked about concerning stage settings and media rules and CD sales and photo ops and etc. and I'm just taking it all in. See on July 16 in the evening, ShaNaNa is going to put on a free half hour concert as a sampling of the music you'll hear on their 40th anniversary CD in Barnes & Noble and also do a CD signing and meet and greet with fans plus they're doing a costume contest - best ShaNaNa inspired costume (think Greasers) wins a free Strata guitar from Guitar Center. Pretty cool stuff, so I got to learn all the logistics of an event like that so that was pretty cool. I stayed pretty quiet during that meeting and at the end we all stood up and shook hands and quickly looked at the area where this will be happening and then Jocko, the Pat Boone guy, Jerry and I left. We went outside and Jocko wanted to talk more about another event they are playing for, this time a full concert for free for a classic car show, 2 days after the Barnes & Noble event. So I sit down for coffee (actually I got lemonade, but everyone else got coffee lol) and Jerry and the Pat Boone guy who's name is Dana went to go wait at the counter for our order and talk more business while I sat with Jocko. He and I started talking about lots of things - he was asking me where I was from and what I wanted to do after I graduated and all this stuff and I asked him about his band days and what it was like being at Woodstock and on the set of "Grease" then all of a sudden this big band jazzy tune came on the loudspeakers and he was like, turn around, this is so cool, so i did and they had the fountains timed to the music so it was like a cool water show and then Jocko starts singing the song to me! And finally the serious enormity of the siutation hit me - a famous rock 'n roll drummer is sitting here conversing with me about my life and is singing to me. Like, seriously, how many people can say that? I mean, this guy is in the Rock And Roll Hall of Fame, and I'm, ya know, just plain old me. And he seems to really be having a good time just conversing with me.

So eventually Jerry and Dana come back and they sit and talk business for awhile. I'm not going to say much on this because it'll probably violate company confidentiality and blah blah blah but just let me say, I got my first lesson in the politics that are involved in the entertainment industry (and, i'm sure, in any business industry). Jocko even turned to me at one point and said "You're learning a lot today, huh kid? It's all about politics!"

Then, Jocko brings up Twitter, and immediately I feel like I have a comfortable hold on the conversation. This is totally my area of expertise, right? Like, I seriously could probably be certified as a professional tweeter or whatever. So Jocko tries to explain how he just created a twitter and is trying to drop hints about the new CD and the events coming up and all and he's just failing to explain it in anyway understanable so I politely interrupt and say "Jocko, I use twitter everyday, can I try to explain?" and he gladly lets me take over and so all of a sudden, the focus is completely on me. These guys are all asking me questions about how it works and the technical names and I'm like, wow, I never realized how much my knowledge of this social tool could help me out. So, since I'm feeling confident now, I take the opportunity to launch into a explanation why I think it is becoming a great publicity tool and a way to connect with a younger generation and the place it could have in the future of PR and blah blah blah and these guys, these industry professionals, are hanging on my every word. And just like that I've apparently created a respect for my ideas because the Dana guy from the record label starts asking me my opinion on everything from the best advertising avenues to reach the demographic ShaNaNa would most resonate with to how to draw in other demographics and how hard to hit them and how we could incorporate social networking sites, such as Twitter, to possibly reach them and just on and on. I kept glancing every now and then at Jerry Brown, hoping I wasn't overstepping my boundaries or anything, and I made sure at one point to say "Remember though it's only my first day so I don't fully understand the logistics of a budget for something like this and what is already planned, but this is what my opinion would be based on what I've learned in my classes" so as to not like, I don't know, like I said, basically overstep my boundaries on my first day. And i'm glad I said that because a few sentences later I remember Jocko saying "Well Jerry, she says she's only here for 8 weeks, but I really think she's gunning for your job!" and Dana agreed and said "she's learned about the politics, now she's just gotta pull the rug out" and I could feel myself blush and I said I would never do that and Jocko said "Not until you're fighting to get paid." and then we kind of changed the subject again. But it was so cool. Because I totally felt like for those few minutes that I belonged in that conversation; that my education thus far put me on this correct track and my brain took off and took that guidance and blossomed it into a full fledged idea for a real client on the spot.

Then things started winding down and everyone needed to head back to the office. But before everyone could get up Jocko said, "well, we gotta do something for Stephanie here" and pulled out a black and white 8x10 from a manilla folder of ShaNaNa and a pen and signed it "Love to Steph - Jocko & ShaNaNa" and I was like, omigosh this is sooooooooo cool in my head. And then Dana pulled out a copy of the CD that's unreleased as of right now and said, "here, do you have one of these yet?" and kind of smiled and now I have a copy of the collector's edition of the 40th anniversary ShaNaNa CD 3 weeks before it's release date! (that I haven't even been able to listen to because my new laptop doesn't have a CD drive,ugh!)

Then we all stood up and shook hands and Dana asked me, "So, while you're here, are you only working exclusively with Solters & Digney?" and I was trying to understand what he was getting at so I was like, "yeah, it's what the program I'm participating in arranged." and he said, "Because if I were hiring at all right now, it would be someone from your generation with the newer ideas and technology knowledge you have." then proceeded to take out his business card and give it to me and shook my hand again and then said goodbye. I kind of stood stunned for a minute. Like, I'm still trying to wrap my brain around that. My first day there and did I kind of get courted by a different company already? It blows my mind. All because of Twitter. See, mom, I'm not really wasting my time after all. :-P

The rest of the day was pretty blah. Went back to the office, grabbed lunch, and sat and hand-recorded Mr. Digney's phone messages until my hand went numb from the combination of writing so much and the air conditioning blasting in the conference room they temporarily put me in.

So, all in all my first day was pretty pretty cool.

Oh, and by the end of the day I felt totally comfortable with all the guys. I mean, I'll still always be on alert just because that's natural in that situation, but I didn't start imagining they had ill-intentions anymore.

And that night we had our first weekly seminar. It wasn't the best seminar in the world, but it was a good starter seminar, which is what I think they were going for with the whole first week vibe. It was this guy who is somehow linked with the University of Dreams program (we all got a $26 copy of his hardcover book for free at move-in!) who ran a 150 super-marathon in the Sahara Desert over 6 days. It sounds like the craziest thing in the world, seriously. But basically his point was that he dreamed of that achievement, and he set his mind to it (albeit later than he would have liked) and completed his goal and made his dream come true. So whatever we dream, especially for our experiences this summer, we can all make happen if we set our minds to it and make the most of the tools given to us. And get it, participants of this program are called "Dreamers"? It all came full circle. Like I said, not the best seminar I've ever been to, but a good opener all the same.

My second day, which for those keeping track was Wednesday, was pretty much the same boring intern stuff from the second part of the first day. Which I think is what most people actually went through on their first day but I just got lucky and had a cool first day. Ya know, recording messages, typing spreadsheets, researching press clippings. In fact, after Tuesday, I felt so trapped from being in the office (did I mention we're on the 11th floor?) all day that I was thisclose to breaking down on the bus on the way home. I kept thinking "this isn't what I want for the rest of my life. I can't be trapped in an office." Then I went into the grocery store and a song that unfortunately contains many memories concerning a certain someone came on and that really did make me lose it. I called my mom crying freaking out. (Those damn hormones). But eventually settled down and really, that was it.

Okay, I need to be done for now. It's way later than I would have liked to be going to bed and I have to be up earlier than normal tomorrow. Why? you ask? You'll have to wait until later to find out :)

And yay I stopped thinking about things while I wrote that.

Until now, dammit.

Goodnight all <3